NONSENSE VERSE

 

Territorial Pissings

 

Country sister said on the phone

There’s just one way to protect your home

It sounds odd, but don’t hesitate

Her message was, just urinate!

 

Walking around the property

With my dick out, improperly

This in a respectable part of town

Indecent exposure, they will frown

 

I’m pissing around the perimeter

Alerting coyotes and other critter

Stay off, stay out, stay away!

Or this alpha boy will have his way

 

And I am full of excellent cheer

As pissing requires a lot of beer

I’ve done the fence posts and the fir

And met a dog, the sniffing cur

 

I watered the neighbour’s flowerbed

Come midnight, they’ll be dead

I’ve done the sidewalk and the road

Beyond the realm of our happy abode

 

Yet now I stagger in a stinking funk

As I forgot about the fucking skunk

I thought everything was well in hand

Until I encountered its ass gland!