SAINTS PRESERVE US
Rallying Around the Brand
The scene is the exclusive executive departure lounge at a major Canadian international airport. Two super elite fliers with similar stories encounter one another for the first time. The alcohol is free and tongues are loosened.
Brand Manager One: Excuse me, is this seat taken? May I share your table? And I must recharge my phone.
Brand Manager Two: Eh? Oh, sorry! Let me move my stuff. Sorry.
BMOne: Hi, I’m Brand Manager Who Only Replies To Media Queries Via Email.
BMTwo: Pleased to meet you! How’d you guess my name?
BMOne: Funny old world, not funny ha-ha but funny nonetheless.
BMTwo: I could use a laugh or two myself these days.
BMOne: Who couldn’t? So… not to pry, but you work for whom?
BMOne: Ooh. Well… you must be pleased your CFO got sprung from the joint on $10-million bail. Nasty stuff, violating trade sanctions and stealing intellectual properties, state sponsored espionage…
BMTwo: It’s always darkest before the red dawn.
BMOne: Excuse me?
BMTwo: It’s always darkest before the dawn. You?
BMOne: Me? I work for Tim Hortons.
BMTwo: Ooh. You know, I just read an unscientific study about the nature of litter in
Apparently when it comes to strewn garbage, your brand’s at the top of the
BMOne: Customers, eh? Can’t live with ‘em; can’t live without ‘em. Still, we serve coffee and treats, not the Chinese Communist Party and the People’s Liberation Army.
BMTwo: At Huawei we pride ourselves on providing our customers ‘A Higher Intelligence.’ That is to say a product of excellent quality at a competitive price. We also treat our employees and vested stakeholders with dignity and respect.
BMOne: Touché. So… campaign season is upon us, the holidays. What are you running?
BMTwo: We’re all in on hockey: ice graphics, rink boards, broadcaster call-outs, set decoration; like that. Seems to be the most reliable way to reach Canadian consumers and millennials don’t pay attention to the news. It’s all good. You?
BMOne: Hockey, eh? Been there, done that. This time we’re going for warm and fuzzy, human interest, real life, heart warming stories narrated by our customers and employees. A real calculated small town feel, everybody of every ethnicity and ability pitching in for the greater good. Similar to Huawei at home, I suppose? So... I bought heavy weight during hockey broadcasts, the usual standard operational Canadiana bullshit.
BMTwo: If it ain’t broke… Hope that works out for you again.
BMOne: Yeah, yeah, thanks. Likewise. Timmy’s has chewed up and spat out a lot of brand equity this year. There’s no maple sugar-coating that. Still… all things considered, it could be a lot worse for the likes of us and our ilk.
BMTwo: Like working in the White House?
BMOne: Yeah, or Brexit.
BMTwo: Or Assad in
BMOne: Or bin Salman in Saudi.
BMTwo: Sears, don’t forget Sears.
BMTwo: Ooh, good one. We still leverage it though.
BMOne: Us too. A devil you know sort of thing.
BMTwo: Anyway, must run, they’re calling my flight. Nice chatting with you.
BMOne: Likewise. Happy next financial quarter!